Having Fun in Sobriety: Debunking the Myth that the Party's Over without Drugs and Alcohol

Living a sober life doesn't mean bidding farewell to fun and enjoyment. Sobriety opens up a world of possibilities, proving that joy and fulfillment can be found without the influence of drugs and/or alcohol.

Rediscovering Genuine Connections:

One of the misconceptions surrounding sobriety is that socializing becomes dull without the thrill of substances. However, the reality is quite the opposite. Sobriety allows individuals to form deeper, more genuine connections with others. Conversations become meaningful, and relationships flourish. 

Mindful Moments:

Sobriety invites the practice of mindfulness into everyday life. Individuals learn to savor each moment fully. From appreciating a beautiful sunset to relishing a cup of tea, sobriety encourages a heightened sense of awareness and gratitude.

Pursuing Passion:

Many individuals find that sobriety provides them with the clarity and motivation to pursue their passions. Whether it's art, music, or a long-neglected hobby, the absence of substances often leads to a renewed focus on personal interests. Sobriety becomes a gateway to discovering and nurturing one's true self.

Physical Well-Being:

Sobriety brings about significant improvements in physical health. Individuals often experience increased energy levels, better sleep, and overall enhanced well-being. This, in turn, contributes to a more active and enjoyable lifestyle.

Adventure and Exploration:

Contrary to the belief that sobriety limits adventurous activities, many find that it opens the door to new and exciting experiences. From hiking and camping to travel and exploration, sobriety enables individuals to embrace life's adventures with a clear mind and a vibrant spirit.

Laughter and Joy:

Laughter, joy, and lighthearted moments are not exclusive to those under the influence. In fact, without substances, individuals often discover a more authentic and contagious form of happiness.

Emotional Resilience:

Sobriety fosters emotional resilience, allowing individuals to navigate life's challenges without resorting to substances to cope or escape. Facing difficulties head-on becomes a source of personal growth and strength, contributing to a more fulfilling and empowered life.

The myth that sobriety is synonymous with a lack of fun is simply unfounded. Embracing a sober lifestyle opens up a world of authentic connections, mindful moments, pursuit of passions, improved physical well-being, adventurous exploration, genuine laughter, and emotional resilience. Breaking free from the shackles of drugs and alcohol doesn't mean sacrificing enjoyment; instead, it paves the way for a richer, more fulfilling life. So, let go of the misconceptions and embrace the joy that sobriety can bring.

A Missoula Montana Trauma Therapist Shares about Nervous System Regulations through the use of Glimmers

A glimmer is defined as a faint or wavering light. A glimmer is also a term that can help us bring awareness to our experiences of safety and regulation. The acceleration of trauma-informed care has created a common understanding of the word trigger. Triggers inform us about our internal states, telling us when we are not feeling well-regulated.

“Our bodies know that they belong; it is our minds that make our lives so homeless.” -John O’Donohue

Our Bodies Response to Triggers:

Triggers signify threat to our nervous system, often connecting with our past experiences. Our autonomic nervous system is wired to respond within milliseconds to keep us safe. When we are triggered, we move out of safety and social engagement into fight or flight. If fighting is not effective, and flight is impossible, then our bodies move into freeze. Freeze responses involve shutdown and immobility. It is a way in which our bodies escape internally. A triggered nervous system moves out of social engagement and into disconnection.

In the everyday energy of our busy lives, our nervous system can become primed for threat. Our sensory systems lie in wait for the next cue for danger, creating anxious states of disconnection. There are many remedies to help recover our frazzled states such as yoga, meditation, diaphragmatic breathing, or mindfulness. But what if there was a strategy to help prime our nervous systems to lie in wait for the next cue for safety?

Deb Dana, author of The Poylvagal Theory in Therapy: Engaging in the Rhythm of Regulation says “glimmers can help calm a nervous system in survival mode and bring a return of autonomic regulation.” Just as a trigger is a cause of a survival response, a glimmer is a cause of a calm and relaxed response. We can practice bringing our attention toward glimmers to ease our mind into states of calm.

What Are Glimmers?:

Glimmers are individual to each person, but there are several that are common among us. Here are some examples of glimmers:

Exchanging a smile with a stranger

• Connection with a coworker who asks about your day

• Bringing to mind people who are important to you

• Pausing in quiet moments with a pet

• Watching snowflakes from a warm, safe place

• Standing on a beach, feeling waves on your feet

• Drinking a cup of tea on a cold day

• Soaking in warm sunshine

• Basking in nature

• Humming

• Enjoying smells of coffee or fresh baked goods

• Smelling flowers

• Feeling delight in a child

• Wrapping up in a warm blanket

Glimmers are moments when your mind marks the occasion as something special. Deb Dana says, “you feel something happen inside. There is an energy that happens around a glimmer, and then your brain marks it as well.”

When to Utilize Glimmers:

When we feel ourselves move into states of fight or flight, we can ask ourselves what glimmers will move us into safety? As we notice our sensory response to glimmers, it helps to pause for about 20 seconds to hold the richness of the experience. Glimmers help us gently return to the experience of connection. Knowing the glimmers of others can also create feelings of connection and support.

Looking for glimmers helps us turn toward positive experiences. When we practice attunement to moments of safety, we can begin to trust in the world again. What are your glimmers?